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Grieve Enough

Updated: Aug 26, 2022

I was reading a book the other day written by Rolf Gates, Meditations on Intention and Being (Anchor Books 2015). He was discussing why people are reluctant to share their feelings, frustrations and vulnerabilities. His conclusion was that “people are fearful of being rejected for being imperfect, for having pain”. (p112)

This truth perfectly describes grief in life.

When we as a society begin to see death and grief as natural as birth and love, then those living with grief in life will no longer need to fear rejection over the pain of grief.

When society begins to view grief as a sacred time in a person’s life, the grieving person will be met with compassion, tolerance and grace. The grieving person will no longer feel the need to apologize for tears. The grieving person will grieve freely, for as long as needed. They will talk openly about their loved one without others steering the conversation in a different direction.

When the sacredness of grief is acknowledged, the pain and sorrow of grief will be embraced. A new appreciation for life will emerge. Death will be revered and cause a pause for reflection. The cycle of birth, life, death and nothingness will be recognized instead of ignored. Our humanness will be honored and the imperfection of grief will be accepted as the norm.

The fear of rejection will cease to exist.


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